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Saturday, December 29, 2012

Humor from Great Minds

Humor from Great Minds

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.
- Norman Wisdom
One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.*"
Edgar Watson Howe
 
 "*A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your
success!*"
Doug Larson
 
 "*A harmful truth is always better then..a useful lie!*"
Eric Bolton
 
 "*We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to
walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.*"
Phyllis Diller
 
 "*Laughter is the closest distance between two people.*"
Victor Borge
 
 "*Start every day with a smile and get it over with.*"
W.C. Fields
 
 "*Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.*"
* *Will Rogers
 
 "*Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work
out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
Mickey Rooney
 
"*Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we
didn't.*"
Erica Jong
 
 "*Don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out of it alive.*"
Elbert Hubbard
 
 "*Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.*
*Wendell Johnson
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